There’s no such thing as a ‘normal’ family.

New data released this National Adoption Week shows there has been a 22 per cent increase in the number of children with a plan for adoption not yet matched with an adoptive family in England in 2023-4, compared to the previous year.

Meanwhile, the numbers of prospective adopters coming forward remains lower than previous years, believed to be largely due to the cost-of-living crisis. This means that there are 780 more children needing to be adopted than there are approved adopters waiting to be matched – with 47 per cent of children facing delays of over 18 months to find their forever home.

However, the new data also shows the journey to adoption for parents may be smoother than is often believed. One in four adoptive families were approved within six months of registration, while 18 per cent of approved adoptive families had a child matched with them within three months – a slight increase of three per cent compared to last year.

During National Adoption Week a lot of people make contact; asking us to address some frequently asked questions. Many address common myths so here we unpick some of those misconceptions, to help with your research.

If you are thinking about adoption this probably means you’re more than halfway there, so take the leap of faith and be reassured that the rewards totally outweigh the challenges.

Can I adopt if I don’t have a spare bedroom?

For many children they will need their own bedroom space but do discuss this with your local regional adoption agency.

How long will I need to be off work after adopting a child?

We recommend that at least one adopter has time off work following a child moving in with their family. A child will need time to build a relationship with their new family and it will take time for them to feel safe and secure. It is difficult to say how long this will take but 12 months is not unusual. If an older child is moving in with their family and attends school, then after a period of settling in it may be possible to work and still be there for the child at either end of the school day.

On occasions a child may need a parent to be off work longer and financial support may be available from the adoption agency in such circumstances. For people who are self-employed and not entitled to adoption leave allowances then we would need to discuss how to balance the need for work and offering a child the stability that they need early on.

Do I need to have finished infertility treatment to start my adoption journey?

People adopt for many different reasons, and it is not essential to have explored having a birth child prior to adopting. However, for those who have embarked on fertility treatment first then the following advice is given.

It is important that if you have had fertility treatment it has come to an end, before starting your adoption journey. Adopting a child needs to be your priority and that will require you to have finally accepted that having a birth child is no longer an option.

Many people who come to adoption due to infertility have accessed counselling following fertility treatments and this is viewed positively.

Once treatment has ended, we recommend that you take some time to come to terms with the fact that it has not resulted in a birth child. Some people can be ready to adopt within a few months and for others it will take longer. We would encourage you to discuss this with your local regional adoption agency who will advise you on this depending on your personal circumstances.

Can I adopt if I have birth children or before considering having birth children?

Yes, you can. The most important consideration is that you and your family have the physical and emotional space to settle an adopted child into your family and then adjust as your understanding of the child grows and their understanding of you grows. That can be enhanced by the presence of birth children.

Can I adopt if I have a mental health condition?

Many people have short periods of stress, depression, or anxiety in their lives and whilst there would need to be discussion about how this has been managed this is unlikely to prevent you adopting a child.

Some people have longer term mental health conditions which are well controlled with medication. There would need to be discussion about this and a medical would provide the agency with medical advice in relation to your ability to adopt a child. The main considerations will relate to the frequency with which you are unwell, how that manifests itself and who is there to offer support at such times.

The focus for the adoption agency will always be to assess your ability to meet a child’s needs in a consistent way and to consider how the stress of adopting a child will affect your mental health. There may be times when the agency feels that some one’s mental health is not stable enough to parent an adopted child but that would be considered early on in the process with the input of medical professionals and the people who know you well.

Will my sexuality or gender affect my chances of adopting?

LGBTQ+ people are welcome to adopt. In fact, about 1 in 5 adopters are LGBTQ+. Many of the life experiences LGBTQ+ people have had has uniquely helped them to parent adopted children. Trans and non-binary people can bring particular strengths to adoption so adoption agencies are keen to hear from adopters of all genders.

For people in a relationship, who are applying to adopt together, adoption agencies will want to know the relationship is stable and enduring. Being in a non-traditional relationship isn’t a barrier to adoption.

Be reassured that there’s no such thing as a ‘normal’ family, according to 65 per cent of Brits. Nearly half of Brits (48 per cent) have a ‘chosen family’ and 42 per cent come from a ‘non-traditional’ family structure. Nine out of 10 (87 per cent) think it’s important to teach children that families come in all shapes and sizes – but half of the public (50 per cent) were not taught this when they were growing up. Whilst only a third (37 per cent) feel that ‘blood’ is an important factor in defining a family, and 42 per cent of the public consider themselves to belong to a non-traditional family – such as blended, extended, adoptive, or single parent.

If you’d like to find out more about adoption or starting your own adoption journey, book onto one of our events now or if you have a question contact your local regional adoption agency