Therapeutic stories – The Life Story Hub
By Natalie Salaman, founder of the Life Story Hub.
Just before Christmas I bought, on impulse, a Christmas tree outside a café and it seemed to me the vendor too quickly reduced his price when I enquired about it. I regretted my purchase as quickly as I’d bought it as something felt not quite right. I recounted the story at my local hairdressers later that day. From beneath her silver foil rectangles and swirling on the chair next to mine a woman smiled at me and said ‘Don’t worry. That will be a great story soon.’ As the tree yellowed and wilted only three days later, her words comforted me. Not only had I learnt yet again that impulsivity is not always successful, but I had extracted some humour from it. We all tell these anecdotes back to ourselves and others once the event is over. Our stories contain so many emotions and have the power to harm and heal.
I believe more generally about stories that the facts are so dependent on how they are told and heard; it is a two-way dynamic. You can find out more about autobiographical stories and life story books that children are told, by looking on the children’s section of the Life Story Hub site. Children’s Hub – Life Story Hub
The stories many adopted children need to hear where the background may have included, neglect, relinquishment and abuse need careful consideration, sensitivity, and respect to a child’s keen sense of loyalty to their birth parents and emotional reactions. It is true that these stories are not at the same level as an anecdote about a Christmas tree yet the processing of any event and its exploration through words, feelings and constructing a story can be an essential part of an integration of an emotional whole. The ability of the storyteller to point out what has not been fair or safe to a child whilst acknowledging when there has been a lack of empathy and compassion without blaming or being dismissive of the first parent is vital. Further food for thought on this is found on the Life Story Hub website. Therapeutic stories can be a valuable way of approaching difficult subjects to prepare for the real-life stories that need to be told.