Your Child’s Story

We no longer live in an age when the facts of adoption are kept secret from children. Adopted children need to know and understand their history. Photos and a life story book are important to help children to make sense of what happened in the past and to help them remember important people who were involved earlier in their lives.

Helping your child understand their story

It has been understood for some time that keeping some form of contact with a birth family generally benefits everyone involved and provides a sense of personal history and continuity, which is vital to a child’s developing sense of identity and helps them to integrate the past with the present.

If contact is agreed, this is most likely to be indirect ‘letterbox’ contact, where an exchange of written information between the adoptive parent and birth family is handled through a central point by regional adoption agency. In this way, all addresses are kept confidential. Direct contact with brothers and sisters, is often considered beneficial for all the children.

Adopters are often supported and encouraged to make a one-off meeting with birth parents before the child is placed. Many adopters find this helps when writing subsequent letters to the child’s birth family, and when answering children’s questions in future.

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